.

I dreamed of him examining me like I'm his patient. Us face to face. Then I leav forward and hugged him softly, surprisingly he didn't move away or anything. He hugged back and kissed my forehead.

My consciousness is trying get rid of him, but my brain wants him back. I try to sleep thinking of hot celebrities, making my own plots and shits, then I fall asleep dreaming bout what I want to think about.

It's not fair! My consciousness is fucking awake. I want to just study and get to the top of the class. I want to just score and make myself proud. I want to achieve and tell myself I'm Not a fucking idiot shit that can't do anything. I am capable of more, and I don't need a guy. But my head just doesn't let me rest when I want to.

I just wanna sleep without dreams. Without car crashes, without him, without stupid random plots that don't make any sense. Is that so hard?