I was relieved that there's like no boys in March intake. But the college badminton has lots of boys. I don't wanna get close with them, but for the sake of badminton, I will. Know how I make boys stop hitting on me?
I miss my ex, truly extremely badly. Maybe I'd be the one 'Seen'ing their messages, then after saying that, they'd 'Seen' mine.
I just done my math homework. So fucking happy. But not so happy, I'm full of shit. Back pain's coming back. Different kind of back pain. Possibly when I removed my office chair, maybe I'm straining my back. And ankle's not getting better. I feel so old, lol. And mad. I have loads of shits in my head, I wanna smash, I wanna punch. I kept telling stomata, I wanna learn kickboxing, she said she'd join me, and we'd learn together. We can even have sparings etc etc. I want to punch properly without breaking my fist. That's all.
The plan was to pretend not to want 'us' anymore. I should pretend harder. Try harder, until he believes, he will treat me normal again. Normal as in, stop trying to make me stop. He could be my training buddy, my crazy ass fierce trainer, my personal critic (lmao), my friend who loves to tease me. And I can be that silent supporter, which.. he knows I'll always be there for him. Just like that. We can be just friends like that.
I dreamed about us, just me at his dining table, and us having a little convo. Then his mom entered. It's awesome. It's nothing much but it's awesome. I miss his mom. That bright bright smile. I failed this week, I'll do better next.
Everytime I miss him, I'd study harder. He's motivation for improvement. He's my anger stimulator, anger is motivation. HAHAA omg. Nah just kidding. His study attitude is my motivation. I want to be like him, but less fierce. I'll be like him without all the swearings.
Right. I should study biooo right now :D
How are you ?
Good, but not so good, actually very bad, but still surviving so,, not too bad,
uhhhuh
I miss my ex, truly extremely badly. Maybe I'd be the one 'Seen'ing their messages, then after saying that, they'd 'Seen' mine.
I just done my math homework. So fucking happy. But not so happy, I'm full of shit. Back pain's coming back. Different kind of back pain. Possibly when I removed my office chair, maybe I'm straining my back. And ankle's not getting better. I feel so old, lol. And mad. I have loads of shits in my head, I wanna smash, I wanna punch. I kept telling stomata, I wanna learn kickboxing, she said she'd join me, and we'd learn together. We can even have sparings etc etc. I want to punch properly without breaking my fist. That's all.
The plan was to pretend not to want 'us' anymore. I should pretend harder. Try harder, until he believes, he will treat me normal again. Normal as in, stop trying to make me stop. He could be my training buddy, my crazy ass fierce trainer, my personal critic (lmao), my friend who loves to tease me. And I can be that silent supporter, which.. he knows I'll always be there for him. Just like that. We can be just friends like that.
I dreamed about us, just me at his dining table, and us having a little convo. Then his mom entered. It's awesome. It's nothing much but it's awesome. I miss his mom. That bright bright smile. I failed this week, I'll do better next.
Everytime I miss him, I'd study harder. He's motivation for improvement. He's my anger stimulator, anger is motivation. HAHAA omg. Nah just kidding. His study attitude is my motivation. I want to be like him, but less fierce. I'll be like him without all the swearings.
Right. I should study biooo right now :D
How are you ?
Good, but not so good, actually very bad, but still surviving so,, not too bad,
uhhhuh
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