I work alone

Imma fucked up uni kid. Why.

I duno whether I can fucking pass my titas. I fucked the quiz. We have group assignments all damn time. Even for biochem, we have shitty PBL and SGD. Experiment with shitty lab partner.

It's already ten months plus being a biotech students. I used to doubt myself, I thought anyone who's got me as their lab partner would suffer. I was wrong. I suffer having them as my lab partner. I suffer to have a lab partner. I don't even want a lab partner. Kitty was good, I thought she was blur. Should've kept a nice lab relationship with her then continue the collaboration. She's actually the best person other than the Ipoh girls. I'm also considered the best person I guess? I do fucked up a couple experiments. But the journals I do, at least they're perfect. I ensure we have the safest marks we can get. I aimed an A for the journals. Kitty was hardworking too to get a good grade. Vitra wasn't like that. I thought I was last minute. I was busy having fun. She was having fun too but she doesn't care. She retook the subject and she still got shitty journal score for us. Why? What the fuck.

I'm so tired. The lab work is fair. You do your part well, I do mine well, we share the score for both parts. I get high marks, you get low marks, drag me down. Is it fun? You aim your pass. I aim an A. You get me to a B, I drag your score up to pass. Is this fair? And you said you'd do it during the holidays. Just say that you can't. No Matter how lost I am, I'd ask and make sure I'd get it at least two days before the fucking submission date. I was super fucking lost during last year genetic report. I got a fucking high score for it tho, because I guess I naturally write good discussions. And you were worried abt how I did it short? At least each and every sentence w careful analysis abt the results. At least I was straight to the damn point so that our lecturers don't have to FIND the point to see how to give marks. The entire paragraph WAS the points.

Dr Cheng somehow heard my rants. I know he understands Chinese. I don't care. I know. Our class was pretty small, there wasn't many to choose to be a lab partner. There wasnt to choose, cuz everyone has their ideal bestie that they could work with, and I'm alone like always. I asked Dr Cheng, can I possibly stand alone to do lab works? He said, yeah I actually can. Well guess what's my target next year. I'd do things alone. Fuck lab partners. Fuck them for fucking my grades. I'm fine if you naturally did badly and did your best. The thing is, you didn't do your best. We're not asked to sit there and do nothing then rush it DURING CLASS for you to finish your job a week ago. You had. A fucking holiday. I'm just... Idk.

Our lecturer was a fucking shit. I know, ms Em shouldn't just make us do all shit assignments together in one week. But that's not an excuse. We all had the same struggle. I did them all at midnight so I didn't trouble my group leaders, so I get to enjoy quality time with people I care in my life. You want to enjoy meanwhile stressing your group leaders down ? Drag yourself down. This isn't sports fiesta. Not all of you can lose while I happily do my part. Your part affects my part. I didn't care about getting champion, or runner ups. I care about my grades.

Fucking hell.

If I don't get a lab partner who's aiming for a fucking A, I'd work alone. Another pros is I'd pay 100% attention to each lab session instead of just 50%, since all the marks would be gained only if I listen, and I have to listen. Now, since it's half half... We only pay attention to half the lab sessions. You'd see some lab members being extra curious and focus during particular days. It's good cuz it means they want to do really well to get good lab results. Unlike some people who dgaf when it's their turn to hold the responsibility. Ffs.