.

When you have two and a half hours to sleep, then you woke up in the middle and get insomnia. I don't even care anymore.

When you don't wanna say "I screwed up again." You go for "I hate ......, I really really hate........"

When the only purpose of music is to cover up all the shit ass noises. Cuz you want the voices in your head the shut the fuck up, but you realize they won't anymore. They be like "You really don't ever learn, huh? Fucktard. Told you to stay away. Stay away from all humans."

Stay away cuz the scariest ones come in random forms. The best types.

Or they be like "Just don't care anymore. Look what that's gonna do to them. Stay safe, protect your fucked up stupid ass heart. Save yourself, cuz you can't save everyone. You'll kill yourself again if you try to save another human."

Tell me, what is, pretending. Pretending that everything's just fine cuz you don't want anyone to look at your face twice. You don't want bullshit. You don't want anyone to ask anything relevant. So they be like hhahahahahahhaha and talk shits back. Stay funnier that way.

And when they finally leave the room, your fucked up familiar sting greets you.

Hi idiot. *Stabs* how does that feel? All because you're doing it again. You fucktard human, you deserve restless days and nights. You deserve all these voices. You deserve, to never just live in peace.

I don't even wanna live for sixty years. No joke. Why does Loong wanna live that long? Is it that fun?..... I wish he reaches that scary target of his. Ten is enough for me. Who loves to live????

Life is a pain. It must be hell!! Disguised with colours and food. It must be hell. Maybe from another dimension, everyone's afraid of being reborned into a human. Such torture.

Yh don't ever stop the negativity. Cuz it's an illusion. When you think it's over, it's a trick. It wants you to think it's over. Then it breaks you into pieces. You gotta use your soul to put them back together.

What if it doesn't wanna be put back together? Let me stay this way. Let me stay looking like crap, living like crap, so I learn. So I stop wanting to get better then die again. And again. Fear doesn't keep me down. It's not simple fear.

You people kill people mentally. Or maybe I don't know how to live. It's natural selection. I really should just kill myself. Even snakes eat themselves when stressed. Why care.

If life gives you all the shit. Don't even try to change it. It's a battle with fate, and you'll never win. If life tries to bring me down, I stay there. Don't even try to balance me, cuz you can never handle me. I'm down for a reason. It's so hard to go back to how I used to be. All of that happened for a reason. Why challenge? Why make it all so hard? Just accept it.