.

I used to think that the most quietest way to release fuckedupmood is freaking punch the wall. And if you need to cry, turn up the volume. Make it so loud you can't hear your own gulps. I was wrong. The walls aren't so good at absorbing the sound especially when you hit hard. It's still very obviously loud. Ahahaha just a sudden thought.

I'm craving cheese. Cheesecake. Cheesy damn pizza. The weather is so hot, so hot I wanna turn on the aircon. It's dumb what people do, right? You eat them anyway even tho you know you're gonna get bad bad diarrhea afterwards. You turn them on even when you already have your nose fucked. We do things we love despite how bad it's gonna end. It's the choice we made, and we prepare to suffer.

I was scrolling fast on fb. Tbh I was looking for a post. Haha. Didn't find it anyway. I saw one photo,

"Not sure about love, but I believe in block at first sight."
This is literally me!

Block at first sight. Uh huh. Sometimes I think it's easy. For someone so unfriendly like me....  Back to college, seeing few snaps that made me feel so lost. June's gone? She left the college and went for further studies at US. And I didn't have any clue. Such a great friend huh? Block at first sight wasn't a joke. I feel bad for not knowing, not saying anything and she just left.

That's how life works. We both didn't put effort to bond well. And guess what, I'm not gonna put effort in anything else anymore.

Everytime I tell myself, fuck everything and concentrate on your studies! Then I fuck up my studies and overthink. This is how! How I screwed my spm, how I screwed my life. Yip man was damn right. These life dramas are just gonna screw up your life. It won't even stop!

When you're tired but you couldn't sleep, what do you do? Sit there and wait to die?